A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Naked. naked and bneed help.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
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