I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
