is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
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