i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
