Sry I called you an 8
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
