He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
