I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
