i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
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