sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Randomize
