She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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