I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
