he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
