he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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