K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
