You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
