Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
