Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
