then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
