69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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