I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
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