I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
