So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
