Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
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