hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Of course I have a pirate flag
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
