Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
