we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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