He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize