I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
