no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Text me some of your sweat
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
