We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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