Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I party with great urgency now.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
