last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
