Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
