what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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