White coat. Heels.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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