hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Randomize