I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
He? As in you personified your dick?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
