I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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