Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
