She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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