i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
