After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
now i know why i became what i already was.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
