Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
