those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
