Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
