I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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