So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Randomize
