Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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