I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
