whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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